Post Archive
Region: Spiritus
*reappears in a frantic state* where is it?! i sensed it, whered it go?!? *looks around for the presence i felt and reaches out with one hand and grasps a small area in the air pulling my hand close* i caught it *opens my hand to reveal a small shred of a womans dress not one fourth of the size of my palm and i look at it* i-its a p-part of her dress... *closes my hand around it gently yet firmly*
Matrixulated
Where did you find the time to dimension hop but keep your physical body in this dimension as well.
Matrixulated
*back in my calm collected usual self* i didnt, i went to the void like always, and i felt a piece of... well *puts the shred away* i felt it leave the void and come to this dimension, and, well you saw. i lost them in the void, normal humans get consumed by the void, forever to be a part of it, but sometimes a piece of it escapes, and when its part of... *sighs* its better i dont talk about it
Matrixulated
*starts to walk off and enters my armory*
Matrixulated
You, my dear [nation=short]Culveria[/nation], are beginning to go the way of the half-boiled potato. There is no way that pizzas are better than potatoes, except if those pizzas have potatoes themselves. I completely agree with Potatogion, what you are saying is nothing less than heresy!
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Alekseandrea, Laughing Buddha, Grumpy Grandma
Greetings to our friends in Spiritus from The West Pacific!
I bring news and an invitation.
The soft breezes of The West Pacific carry the news of change. Our beloved Delegarth Elelgarth has elected to end his term as TWP Delegate after 319 days for personal reasons. He has served this region well. His firm, fun, snarky governance will be missed. Long Live Elegarth! Ascending to the vacated post is Big Bad Badger, the Commander of the TWP Armed Forces. During the transition, the legendary Mediobogdum, held the reigns.
Good friends of TWP, this is not a typhoon, wiping away the regions familiar names and customs, nor is it a tsunami, resulting from a sharp shift away from TWPs foundations. Although the timing may be a bit of a surprise, the transition has been well planned and will be smoothly executed. All treaties and relationships will continue unaffected.
Some things never change. TWP is still the place to be for fun and island hospitality! Punday Mondays and Karaoke Fridays still amuse and entertain. Every Thursday, nations line up to submit their best acts to TWPs Got Talent!
Many of the old guard still actively serve TWP as its Guardians. Elegarth has taken on the role of Security Guardian, Yy4u is the RMB Watchdog, Mediogogdum is the Grumpy Old Sage, Bhang Bhang Duc is the WA Minister/Snark Lord, Darkesia serves as Pollmaker and Wickedly Evil People is Emperor for Life. Some new officeholders (but not new to TWP) are Yuno Owl serving as The TWPAF Commander, Neenee as Internal Affairs Guardian and Davelands as Foreign Affairs Minister.
Finally, TWP Armed Forces are better than ever. Recruitment and training have been BBBs top priorities as Commander and its really paid off! Our talented soldiers have aided our allies in several important missions. Yuno Owl, the always energetic, plans to expand upon these improvements and has already recruited many new soldiers.
To celebrate TWP, its customs, history and future and to thank our many supporters, the region is hosting a fantastic party. Please refer to the attached invitation.
The Delegate and Guardians of
The West Pacific
Request the honor of your presence at a
Weekend-Long Celebration
Given in thanks for the many nations and regions that have supported TWP.
The festivities begin on the RMB, our forum and our Discord server on Friday, October 14th. Join us first thing in the morning for our Friday Karaoke tradition. The official celebration begins at 19:00 (USA EDT) with formal introductions, and will continue throughout Friday into Sunday. There will be games, music, an open chat party, amusing stories about The West Pacific and a panel discussion on the history of TWP. A highlight of the celebration will be a State of the Region address offered by Big Bad Badger at 20:00 (USA EDT) on Saturday. TWP will also hold joint military operations in recognition of the event. All nations or regions that would like to participate should contact our new Commander of TWPAF, yuno owl.
Feel free to join us for any or all of the celebration, as your schedule permits. Whenever you arrive, you may describe your entrance and announce yourself, if you wish.
No RSVP requested.
Should you have any questions about the party, please contact Neenee
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Maytreya
To answer that question have a look at my vegetable patch in my back garden - It is mostly potatoes; some other herbs, veg, and strawberries, but mostly potatoes - They are one of the simplest and healthiest meals one can make or have; full of slow-burning carbs, fibre, vitamins, and minerals - You can quite literally live off them and little else! - Love 'em!
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Alekseandrea, Cyrtes, Laughing Buddha
Incidentally those potatoes I was baking earlier are done - There's far too many for a little old lady like me to eat...
*Brings out portable baked potato oven, stall, and fold up tables and chairs*
*Places a small mountain of butter, salt, pepper, a large tub filled with grated cheese, a huge canteen of baked beans, a steaming pot filled with chilli beef, and another large tub filled with tuna nicoise salad, and a crate of homemade and bottled lemonade on the table*
Right who wants what?!
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Alekseandrea, Cyrtes, Laughing Buddha
*** The Spiritus Grumpy Grand-Fest 2016 ***
OGG Original Grumpy Grandpa: 3 bitcoins from [nation=Masylvana], bid needed from [nation=Owllfarm], ten x 5LB bags of King Edwards from [nation=The Botched Pejazzle of the Studly Spud],
CLOGG Cookie Loving Original Grumpy Grandma: 10 bags of humbugs, 3 dozen freshly baked, hot and slightly gooey cookies, a tray of brownies, 3 dozen scones, a jar of clotted cream, strawberry conserve, a pot of tea, a pitcher of homemade lemonade, and some potato cakes from [nation=Grumpy Grandma]
Place your bets! (and tag me so I see them)
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, The Grumpy Grandpa, Alekseandrea, The Survivors Of California, Laughing Buddha, Grumpy Grandma
You forgot I took the ten x 5LB bags of King Edwards and baked them! - I just served them up!! Here:-
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Istanialand
It is very true. Cyrtes is a true potatriot.
And yay! I now like you even more now. I don't even know how that is possible.
I'll take a bit of all of it.
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Alekseandrea, Grumpy Grandma
Whats next?... grumpy cat? grumpy kid? grumpy computer?
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Grumpy Grandma
I'll bet the contents of The_Grumpy_Grandpa's firearm cabinet on Grandma.
I knew that electric mole was going to come in handy.
Matrixulated, Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Istanialand, Grumpy Grandma
Grumpy Potato.
M.
Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Maytreya, Grumpy Grandma
Wow!
Did Grumpy Grandma just pull down Studly Spuds shorts, put him over her knee, and spank him in public?
Oh Hell yeah she did!
Ooooh! Sick burn, nephew.
You got PWNED by CLOGG!
M.
The Salaxalans, Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Grumpy Grandma
1) I'm not really a betting man.
2) OGG is my Hero.
3) Loyalty & Integrity are paramount.
. . . however . . .
4) CLOGG can really throw down in the kitchen!
5) This is a rabidly potato-genic region and
Grumpy Grandma just cooked-up a whole treasure trove of goodies & baked potatoes!!
So . . . Istanialand
I'm betting on CLOGG
O
The Salaxalans, Alekseandrea, Istanialand, Grumpy Grandma
To some of the philistines on the rmb:
I, the first person singular, is always written with a capital letter i.
Now you know, You have no excuse.
Be warned.
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Grumpy Grandma
Do you really think that's going to work?
Matrixulated, Grumpy Grandma
I can try.
It's all we can do.
Matrixulated, Grumpy Grandma
▪ Philistine noun
1. (sometimes initial capital letter) a person who is lacking in or hostile or smugly indifferent to cultural values, intellectual pursuits, aesthetic refinement, etc., or is contentedly commonplace in ideas and tastes.
2. (initial capital letter) a native or inhabitant of ancient Philistia.
"Only a Philistine wouldn't capitalise the first letter in Philistine, because he wouldn't know it's origins in the second meaning..."
▪"RMB" is an acronym; an abbreviation of "Regional Message Board", as such it should be atleast capitalised, if not separated by periods ie. "R.M.B.".
I have no idea who you were addressing, who isn't capitalising the first person singular, but if you are going to point fingers, and lecture others, remember this young man;
"When you point fingers, only one finger points at those you address, while three are pointing at you" - ie. make sure you aren't making similar mistakes!
*Gets the cane out (not a walking stick)*
Matrixulated, Alekseandrea
...
Find anyone who types "R.M.B.".
I dare you.
Matrixulated, Grumpy Grandma
I use RMB, I expect that a truely zealous Grammar Nazi would use R.M.B. - Infact this may be a test for Grammar Nazism...
Matrixulated, Alekseandrea
*comes out of my armory with a huge 8 Gage shotgun customized* look what i found in my armory
Matrixulated, Faulknation
Neat.*takes picture*
Matrixulated
Nice gun, but does it shoot Bowsers?
Matrixulated
what the fudge do you mean by that?
Potatogion
Wow! You call that a weapon?! You call that armed?!
*Lifts skirt over right leg to reveal a .500 Smith and Wesson Magnum strapped in a holster to my thigh*
*Lifts skirt over left leg to reveal a Vipertek VTS-989 Heavy Duty Stun Gun strapped to that thigh*
*Subtly rotates, clicks, and pulls a long samurai sword out of her walking stick*
*Pulls out a Deringer from her bra*
*Reveals two DSR-Precision DSR 50 Sniper Rifles make up the "hump" in her back*
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Darkweb, Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Potatogion, Faulknation
grandma... who the hell do you think i am? *tengan toppa gurren lagan lands behind me*
Alekseandrea, Potatogion, Faulknation, Exosis, Grumpy Grandma
and this is just one tiny piece of my armory of legendary weapons
Potatogion, Grumpy Grandma
wait, no it wouldnt land behind me it would be seen behind me
Potatogion, Grumpy Grandma
That's pretty cute.*pulls RT-2PM Topol out of my sock*
Grumpy Grandma
potatogion. tengan toppa gurren lagan is bigger than the biggest galaxys, it can literally throw them around
Potatogion
I had to ask that newfangled Goggle contraption what the hell a "tengan toppa gurren lagan" was! - Tut-tut NEVER reveal ALL you have to back yourself up! - Do you seriously think I did?!
Matrixulated, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Potatogion
thats not all i have to back myself up grandma, dont you know im also a god?
Potatogion
Oh dear you made an old woman smile!
*Eyes up the size of your "missile program"*
The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Potatogion
*sits down having all my weapons go back into the storage dimension of mine* i bore. what now?
Potatogion
Thank you very much miss. I work very hard on my large weaponry.
Grumpy Grandma
I HAVE NO TRUCK WITH "GOD/S" (or people who think themselves as such) - Why would a "God" need material weapons, an armory, or have a nation that is organised around a Monarchy?! - FOR SHAME!... FALSE GOD!... IMPOSTOR!!... CHARLATAN!! - YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A FRAUD AND TRICKSTER!!!
Matrixulated, Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Potatogion, Faulknation
THE ONLY TRUE GOD IS POTATO JESUS, and/or whatever you believe in. I really don't care.
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Alekseandrea, Grumpy Grandma
no im just a bored god, ive been around since the begining of time and these people i rule are my most loyal worshippers and they appointed me there king and i have material weapons for fun, its not very fun just smiting people out of existence, *lays around bored*
Potatogion, Grumpy Grandma
potato jesus is a lazy god he doesnt do anything. his only true power is being immortal he just sits around
Potatogion
THIS IS WHY RELIGIOUS WARS HAPPEN! TIME FOR THE GREAT POTATO CRUSADE! QUIA ANNUUM!
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Faulknation, Grumpy Grandma
no, because humans never devote themselves enough to commune with there gods unless there gods go to them, my followers have been able to do that for centuries, and because the reliable connection they have with me they made me there king/god. please dont start up any crusades again
I WILL START A CRUSADE IF I WANT TO START A CRUSADE! QUIA ANNUUM! SOLANUM TUBEROSUM PRO PATRIA!
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Faulknation, Grumpy Grandma
let me ask you potatogion, have you been meditating for years and years to be able to commune with your god without him going to you which would never happen because hes always on his potato god throne
As a matter of fact I can commune with Potato Jesus. Potato battery phones are the wonder of the future, even able to communicate with gods.
The Salaxalans, Grumpy Grandma
You called?
Matrixulated, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Faulknation, Grumpy Grandma
*chuckles* i see, but its so much better using your own mind, you see that cant be taken, and you rely too much on potatos
I choose to follow potato Jesus. I saw a god and so I follow.
no you saw potatos and chose to follow
Matrixulated, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud
Potatoes and gods are the same my child.
I saw a god that was a potato.
The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud
*looks at potato jesus with a murderous glare* you are aware jesus dies right? henceforth you can die, NEVER call gods potatos other than yourself, i am not one of those dreadful tuber vegetables. i am a god i take offence personally
Jesus chose to die. Since Jesus is/maybe is God then he is all powerful. He chose to die then he came back to life. I also did that, except I was boiled and not hung on a cross. I also didn't call gods potatoes, I called potatoes gods. All potatoes are a part of me, meaning that they are gods. All potatoes are gods; not all gods are potatoes
I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL CUT ALL OF YOU. GET OFF MY LAWN AND GAMBLE ELSEWHERE.
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Grumpy Grandma
YOU HAVE [I]NOTHING[/I] ON [nation=shortname]Grumpy Grandma[/nation]
SHE'LL WRECK YOUR PETTY GOD ASS ANY DAY OF THE WEEK, SON.
AS FOR ME, WELL, I DON'T LIKE BEATING PEOPLE THAT ARE BELOW MY LEVEL.
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Faulknation, Grumpy Grandma
*walks 1 meter away from gramps lawn*
I bet 5 potatoes on Grandma
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, The Grumpy Grandpa, Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Faulknation, Angry Grandpas, Grumpy Grandma
Same. I am a potato god and even she scares me.
Matrixulated, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Grumpy Grandma
she hasnt dealt with me before, she has no weapons that i dont have a legendary superior of, and i have much more motivation than her
Matrixulated
nor have you young one
Don't let her worry you, my liege. POTATA stand together!
Very good my child. For people like you, there is a very special place in potato heaven when you pass from this world.
No weapons you have a legendary superiority of? I never heard you about baking potatoes and giving them away to others.
Alekseandrea, The Great Potato Empire, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Grumpy Grandma
That is a very good point my child. Generosity is a key aspect for a fruitful life.
Grumpy Grandma
i give potatos, food, and money away to millions across the globe, and i help rebuild destroyed homes and destroyed cities and the like
faulknation where are you?
But aren't you the one who destroys those buildings in the first place. One plus negative one still equals zero.
Grumpy Grandma
no i dont destroy the buildings why would i do that? if i want a place taken out i wipe it off the face of the earth
-1+-1=-2
the were places that banned potatos
and your math is terrrible!!!!! its -1-1=-2
People can believe what they want.
More than one problem can equal the same product. Both equal -2 and both represent the destruction you cause.
Grumpy Grandma
ALL OF YOUR POINTS ARE INCORRECT.
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Faulknation, Grumpy Grandma
For all those "God-botherers" and beLIEvers out there:-
https://youtu.be/NFGTu-OxFpU
...And if you all wish to fight over territory or followers, go ahead, but I'll just place this here for you to think over:-
https://youtu.be/GcJi5ulVwuc
The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud
O_o
"Yo sound the bells school's in, sucka . . ."
* (-1) - (-1) = 0 *
"You can't touch this!"
M.
Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Cyrtes, Grumpy Grandma
sorry, I have been busy...but you called?
Matrixulated, Alekseandrea
"Behold, the undeniable logic of [nation=short]Matrixulated[/nation]!"
Matrixulated, Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Grumpy Grandma
Okay, so this is what we are going to do. First we are going to meet in a secret place, a place that not very many people know about. Then we shall discuss this in greater detail at the meeting. HEY ARE YOU STILL LISTENING, okay good. While all of this is going on I want you to just act normal and don't freak out, and especially don't let the cops or anyone know what we are doing. You got all of that good, because I am not going to repeat myself, here are the coordinates on where we will meet: 54.2361° N, 4.5481° W. Make sure you go there on October 18, 2016 no sooner and no later. Peace out.
p.s. this is only step 1 of 3, the next telegram will come on October 18, 2016.
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated
Are we going into full potato ARG mode or something?
Matrixulated, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud
You are doing the wrong question. I did -1+-1 which does equal -2. I understand where you were coming from, but you just came from the wrong place.
Matrixulated, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Cyrtes
▪So the coordinates you gave tell us to meet on the Isle of Man.
>>For those not so familiar with geography:- the Isle of Man is a self-governing British Crown dependency in the Irish Sea between England and Ireland. Its known for its rugged coastline, medieval castles and rural landscape, rising to a mountainous center.
>> The coordinates particularly point to a point in the mountainous center of the island, approximately 90 yards from a small rural/country road.
▪ On Tuesday 18th of October, the only public event listed as going on on that Island, that could possibly want to accept an influx of random strangers from across the world:- A performance of Rodgers & Hammerstein's "South Pacific" at the "Gaiety Theatre" - However, that is not at the coordinates you mentioned, and I doubt you were going to go to all this trouble to fill a small theatre with random strangers from across the globe...
Maybe I overthought this load of crap?!
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, The Grumpy Grandpa, Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Cyrtes, Faulknation
Maybe they mean Isle Of Man? I don't know. :P
Matrixulated, Alekseandrea, Grumpy Grandma
Let's all send puppets there on that day to investigate!
Matrixulated, Alekseandrea
Hello it's nice to meet you all, I'm new to this
Please feel free to tell me things about this
I hope to have fun with all of you ^×^
Matrixulated, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud
in essence talk about potatoes and don't piss off grandpa or Culveria
Matrixulated, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud
YOU KIDS AND YOUR DAMNED CLUES
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Faulknation, Grumpy Grandma
Grumpy Grandma shouts from the kitchen,
"SHUT UP! THIS ISN'T SCOOBY DOO, YOU OLD FART.
NOW MOW MY DAMNED LAWN!"
. . . and continues baking merrily.
M.
The Salaxalans, Alekseandrea, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Grumpy Grandma
you are incorrect
Faulknation
help me with these potatos
The Salaxalans, Faulknation
*nervously turns into dark dirty street by the mcdonalds corner* hey,any of you fellas have some dope potatoes ??
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud, Faulknation
*looks at metreya with a murderous glare* drugs are not allowed here
Maytreya
You can have as many of my dope potatoes as you can consume, my child.
Faulknation, Maytreya
I'll say IceCream,because I don't know what the heck is a Gelato.
The Salaxalans
It is pretty much fancy Italian ice cream.
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, Audriany
like ice cream with a gellish texture and a finer kind
Matrixulated
YOU MOW YOUR LAWN, WOMAN!
NO IM NOT
The Salaxalans, Matrixulated, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud
Post self-deleted by Culveria.
Even your grammar is wrong. its I'M
some of my weapons come from millennia in the future, each one superior to grandmas
In rage, grammar doesn't matter.
Matrixulated, The Botched Pejazzle Of The Studly Spud
Assembled with Dot's Region Saver.
Written by Refuge Isle.